Thursday, October 24, 2013

Do I have to share?

I was asked recently if I had to share my erotica writing by someone who understood that it's a way for me to find some sexual release (once I have a fantasy written down, it's no longer in my head and I don't dwell on it).

I have to admit that I feel a little conflicted about it. I'm a spiritual person and this is definitely not spiritual writing and while it is a release for me, it might not exactly be a positive thing for others.

I used to just share my erotica for free on the web site Literotica but now I'm self published and get a little income from my writing, which makes it even more difficult NOT to share since there's a monetary reward for it now.

There's also the part of me, which is part of any writer or artist, to seek validation and how can I get validated for what I do if I don't share it?

What do you think?


  1. I think the question that these persons are really asking is 'can you not share it where I can see it?' and the answer is yes, but the solution lies with THEM. THEY need to unsubscribe from seeing your updates in their Facebook/Twitter/Google, etc feeds (and there's plenty of ways to do that). So long as your work is not hurting, or advocating the hurt of, anyone, you have the perfect right to be proud of it and to post it wherever and however you so choose. Just as they have the right to look away and not read it. You're a great writer - don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. You are a positive influence on us in the group to which we both belong, and I look forward to seeing more from you.

    1. By sharing, they were referring to the publishing of my erotica.

  2. Then they're still in the wrong, in my opinion. (And it is but my own opinion; I have no right, either, to judge them, but if what they think matters, then so does everyone else's thoughts.) You have the perfect right to publish whatever you like, so long as it hurts no one in any way. They don't have to buy your book. I hope you find more openminded people to surround you, and I wish you the best successes in the future.

  3. Steven, perhaps you're feeling a bit of the most common tool of Western religions — shame. Perhaps a holdover from the archaic connection of pleasure and sin, a wonderfully effective means of controlling one's congregation. If pleasure induces guilt, and the deeper shame, and yet is so powerful it will not be denied, those who want to control the behavior of others (no matter if their motives are the salvation of a soul; the desire for control is still there) have an upward spiral of need for their services, to assuage the guilt and plant the seeds of more guilt for the next time.

    There is no connection between pleasure/feeling good and wrongness. Pleasure is. It exists. It is hard-wired into us. We were created to experience pleasure, and with good reason, just as we were created to experience pain and with good reason. To find pleasure as somehow dirty is to proclaim that your god is a dirty god, since that god is (presumably) the creator of all that is. The pleasure one finds in sex is no more dirty or wrong than the pleasure one finds in looking at a beautiful sunset.

    There is no sin, dirtiness or shame in desire. That, too, was created, hard-wired into us. If a deity creates beings a certain way and then condemns them for being the very way he created them, that deity is at best unworthy of my worship and at worst a liar and a cheat.

    This is probably way more than you wanted. If I've said this in a way that offends, for that I apologize. I have no desire to offend you.